Business Coach, Author Carol Kinsey Goman
Who she is: Carol Goman, PhD, is a keynote speaker, leadership communication consultant, body language coach.
What she does: The author of “The Silent Language of Leaders: How Body Language Can Help—or Hurt—How You Lead,” and, “The Truth About Lies in the Workplace: How to Spot Liars and What to Do about Them,” Goman tells it like it is.
Why she does it: “Most workplace lies (and liars) are discovered after the fact — after you’ve signed the faulty contract, hired the wrong person, or agreed to work on that career-limiting project,” she says. “But wouldn’t it be a savvy professional strategy to be able to spot liars in action, before the harm was done? From my latest book, “The Truth About Lies in the Workplace,” here are seven tips for spotting liars at work.”
By Carol Kinsey Goman, PhD
Business Coach, Author
Here’s the Truth About Lies — and how to tell when someone isn’t coming clean.
1. Establish a “truth baseline.” Spotting deception begins with observing a person’s baseline behavior under relaxed or generally stress-free conditions so that you can detect meaningful deviations. One of the strategies that experienced interviewers use is to ask a series of simple questions while observing how the person behaves when there is no reason to lie. Then, when the more difficult issues get addressed, the interviewer can stay alert for sudden changes in behavior that may indicate deception around key points.
2. Watch for stress signals. For the vast majority of the individuals you interview or work with, the act of lying triggers a heightened stress response. Blood pressure, heart rate, and breathing rates all increase.To relieve stress and anxiety, liars may use pacifying gestures (rubbing their hands together, bouncing their heels, fidgeting with jewelry, etc.). But our first response to stress (before we ready ourselves to fight or flee) is to freeze. So also pay attention if your usually animated colleague suddenly stops gesturing, has a forced or frozen smile, and locks her ankles.
3. Look at their eyes. The biggest myth around deception is that liars can’t look you in the eye. In fact, some don’t (especially small children), but polished liars may actually give too much eye contact. Two eye signals are more accurate signs of dishonesty: Pupils dilate when someone is lying, and blink-rates change—slowing down while someone constructs and tells the lie, and then speeding up (sometimes as much as eight times) afterward.
4. Count to four. Nonverbal cues to all kinds of unconscious giveaways tend to occur in clusters—a group of movements, postures, and actions that collectively point to a particular state of mind. This is crucially true of dishonesty, where one specific cluster of nonverbal signals has been proven statistically to accompany dishonesty. These are: hand touching, face touching, crossed arms, and leaning away. According to research conducted at Northeastern University by David DeSteno, if you see these “Telltale Four” nonverbal signals being displayed together, watch out!
5. Notice if they aren’t really answering the question. Because of the mental effort it takes to tell a baldfaced lie (and because it triggers negative emotions), many deceivers prefer to avoid the truth with quasi-denials and selective wording. Notice how the responses below (which may be absolutely valid) never actually answer the questions.
- Question: Have you ever used drugs?
- Answer: I don’t take drugs.
- Question: Did you steal a computer from the supply room?
- Answer: Do I look like the kind of person who would steal a computer?
- Question: Did you leave your last place of employment on good terms?
- Answer: I left to pursue other opportunities.
- Question: Did you pad your expense account?
- Answer: How can you ask that? I’ve been a loyal employee for more than 10 years!
6. Listen for vocal stress. The primary paralinguistic (how you say what you say) signal that often indicates lying is a change in someone’s baseline vocal pitch, which usually rises with stress levels as vocal chords constrict. Under stress, people may also experience an increased need to drink water and to lick or moisten lips, as the autonomic nervous system downloads a rush of adrenaline, causing a dry mouth.
7. Stay alert for “undercover” emotions. Smiles are often used as a polite response and to cover up other emotions, but these faked smiles involve the mouth only. Unless someone is expressing genuine pleasure or happiness, it’s hard to produce a real smile—the kind that crinkles the corners of the eyes and lights up the entire face. There is another way that real emotions emerge, regardless of the effort to suppress them. When someone conceals any strong emotion, chances are his or her face will expose that information in a split-second burst called a “micro-expression.” Difficult to spot because it happens so quickly, that instantaneous flash of anger, dismay, joy, etc., is an indicator of someone’s genuine emotional state.
Note: Please remember that none of these verbal or nonverbal cues are proof of lying. Truthful people can show signs of stress, have a naturally high blink rate, or give roundabout answers. And both liars and truth-tellers may exhibit fear—one of being discovered, the other of not being believed. Nevertheless, these signals are strong indicators of heightened anxiety, possible deception, and of “hot spots” — areas that you should investigate further.